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  1. #21
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    Quote Karubaluna: I'm on the fly so I don't have a lot of time for this. Kinda too bad as it should have been done long ago. You are right mmlover. I should have stood up for you too. I am sorry for that and I've been sorry that I did not for a long time.

    I did not know, and still don't, that you were being screamed at and harrassed etc, etc. What I did suspect at the time was that you were being played in a rather underhanded and unkind manner. But I was duped into believing that you were the guilty party. I realized in due course I was being played myself in exactly the same manner. Such is life I suppose. And I don't say I didn't deserve it.

    Cheers. Unquote Karubaluna

    It would seem that someone is trying to edit history. For those of you who missed this the first time around it was taken off the board before I had a chance to respond to it.

    It would appear that you either took back the apology or iStan took it back for you. If your apology is sincere I will accept it, if it?s not sincere, then oh well. :)

  2. #22
    Senior Member Veyron's Avatar
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  3. #23
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    In all fairness, iStan did not erase that post.

    KarubaLuna erased the post and all of her posts on this bored. :(

    This does not mean she withdraws that apology (which I know was honestly meant and wholeheartedly given), but just that she has left the bored completely.

    Goodbye Dearest KarubaLuna. You are a WONDERFUL WOMAN. :smt049
    For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours and laugh at them in our turn. Jane Austen

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    In all fairness, iStan did not erase that post.
    Thank you, RIII.

    I've never edited a post or prevented members from freely posting their thoughts on this bored.
    Stanley Tweedle is a god, a warrior, and a gent

  5. #25
    Senior Member Veyron's Avatar
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  6. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    In all fairness, iStan did not erase that post.
    First you are pissed at him and now you are defending him?

    I must say, you've come across in this thread as desperate, petty and weak.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    This does not mean she withdraws that apology (which I know was honestly meant and wholeheartedly given), but just that she has left the bored completely...
    ...for a few weeks.

  8. #28


    Quote Originally Posted by Tidus
    I must say, you've come across in this thread as desperate, petty and weak.
    Yeah, but she could still kick your ass. :twisted:



    :-D

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    Since this thread is addressed to iStan, perhaps people are awaiting his explanation before jumping to conclusions.
    Hello Funky.

    I doubt an explanation will be forthcoming. You and I, and anyone who has seen the moderators' forum or sat in on the moderators' chats, knows that iStan plays from behind the scene and uses others to do his dirty work. Currently, I?d say that he has no one on hand.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tidus
    Why did it have to be specifically June 1st anyway?
    When you give notice, be it at work or in a volunteer capacity, it is done out of consideration and a degree of respectful social behaviour. To leave a job or a position without notice is to contravene these basic tenets of social interaction. Similarly, to show up for work and find yourself locked out from your office and your name deleted without an explanation, one word of recognition, or any reason given is a slap in the face. If iStan had enough time to remove my name, revoke my access to the moderator forum (where I wanted to wish goodbye privately to my fellow moderators), he must surely had enough time to click the PM button and let me know why he was doing so (especially considering he mentioned no problem with my June first date when I sent him my resignation PM).

    Think of it this way:

    You?ve agreed to look after an elderly relative, you?ve lived there, cleaned up, dealt with problems (no matter your personal feelings or how distasteful), and then, one day, you give notice saying you?ll be leaving in two weeks. You wait a little while and let your friends know you are going . A few days before your final date, you wake up and find all the doors are locked, your stuff dumped out on the floor and not a word of appreciation, thanks or acknowledgement for all you have done.



    It?s the principle of it Tidus, not the magnitude of the offence.


    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    Things are wonderful, just celebrated the fourth month lunaversary of my son and heir to the throne Truly, my humble home is my castle.
    Congratulations on your son, Funky. I love my two children ? they are the highlight of every day for me. :D I?m sure yours will be the same for you.

    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    Noted... Far be it for me to judge intent. I'm all for frank and open discussion; transparency and accountability.

    I can't help but wonder how each of us would have dealt with the situation when we were moderators fisting for a common (or not that common necessarily) cause. We might have said that this should have been handled by PM, or that people shouldn't pass judgment, or make assumptions, before hearing both sides.
    Well, I?m still waiting to hear the other side here too. You and I both know how this works ? if there are no hired guns available, the issue will be avoided ? following one of iStan?s favourite maxims (I think it?s a Japanese proverb):

    ?If you sit by the river long enough, you will see the body of your enemy float by.?

    I was perfectly content to leave the position of moderator and drop by the bored occasionally. But I won?t be slapped in the face and then walk away. It?s not the kind of person I am (as everyone here knows, iStan no less than anyone else).

    One thing I will say (and which might explain to Tidus my ?weak? behaviour) is that iStan does not censor the bored. Why should he? The only one who looks bad here is me. However, he will not even enter the discussion, he won?t explain his actions, nor will he validate mine with a response. There?s a reason he has the nick ?iMachiaveli? ? and it?s not all to do with his like of apples. ;)

    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    Mistakes; we made a few (I sure have).
    I?d be curious to know which ones you include? Stabbing mmlover in the back was the worst one I can think of. The evidence seemed to point that way, but then the evidence was conveniently hand delivered by iStan. I know I?ve apologised to her for that before and she was very gracious, as was she when I posted (in sincerity) that she was the best moderator this bored had had. Another mistake I freely admit to is sitting back while iStan abused his position as owner and administrator, which certainly had a cumulative effect. Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. It's not surprising this bored has declined.

    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    At other sites I've frequented this "controversy" would have elicited many responses by now (would have been closed or deleted by now too). Could fear be a factor?

    The members, on the whole, do seem less likely to speak their minds than at lexx.com (too cautious about not offending each other). Kill, or overly discourage, the nasty, and you kill the fun... but I digress.
    Fear, or ennui at seeing the same thing over and over again? I see a pattern forming, and patches in the sky.

    Just why does this story seem to come back? Perhaps, maybe, there?s some truth to it.

    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    It was premature to remove RIII at this time, but not by much. I don't know how big a deal it really is... in the grand scheme (scheming?) of things. Nor do I know why RIII decided to leave.

    I could think up various reasons for the early removal (mistake, malice, whatever), but I'll wait to see what happens here before publishing any conjecture or coming to my own conclusions based on what is said.
    That is wise. However I doubt you?ll hear the other side, or the truth of it if you did.

    Why did I leave? Well, that?s a private matter and not for consumption on this board, or any other. It was not directly because of iStan. He and I have had no dealings, except the odd PM wishing him a Happy New Year or good health. My only interaction with iStan has been public ? here or in the moderators? forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    I've been complicit in things I'm not proud of too over the years, but, I tend not to take board happenings that seriously on the whole (though I've made genuine friends off boards).
    We have all been complicit in things. We did what we thought best at the time, given the information we had (or, as it turns out, misinformation). We stepped up to be moderators, and deal with a bad situation and we did deal with it. It was only later, when more evidence and a better understanding of what was going on behind the scenes came to light that it became apparent, to me and to Karuba at least, that the situation was not at all what appeared to be. (I cannot speak for either Funky or Yoyo on this, but Karuba and I discussed it at length.)

    Quote Originally Posted by FunkET
    Anyway, best of luck to RIII (and kudos on a non-boring topic, but please, think of the kittens).
    It was thinking of the kittens that got me into this in the first place Funky. ;)

    If you recall I turned down being a moderator before mmlover stepped up to the plate. I admired her for doing that and thought she did a great job ? as I have said repeatedly on the bored.

    I also declined to be a moderator during the Ketana Krisis, and it wasn?t until iStan threatened to close the board permanently that I agreed to take the position on. Like many others here, I cared very much about the bored and there were (and are) a great many people I like here. Weighing the scales, even in hindsight, I would probably do the same in the same situation ? under threat of losing the board.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tidus
    So what would have been acceptable conduct on his part? The only thing that comes to mind is to send her a PM/E-mail, thanking her for her service, or maybe replying to her thread and giving a public thanks?

    If that is the case, then maybe he's been too busy lately and hasn't had the time. Either way, I still think this is being blown a little out of proportion...
    Why slap me in the face (as iStan knows very well it was) at all? What was two days to him, except some way to make a point? Heck, the day before I had even been moderating for him. I have not sat idly around on this bored and I have done a good job, even you Tidus have commended me and my efforts and work.

    (LOL You?d be surprised to know that this morning I was thinking that you?d make a very fine lawyer. You articulate well, get to the point, and often pick up what others miss. In this case, however, you?re off your mark. You were far closer in the Moderator Situation Thread. Unfortunately, at the time, Karuba, FunkET, Yoyo, and I did too good a job protecting iStan from the situation he himself had created. )

    Quote Originally Posted by ILyekkaKai
    RIII should know that all of us have appreciated her time and job spent on this BB as a mod and friend.
    Thank you ILK. You particularly, and many of the other GREAT people here on the bored are why I have stuck around long past the time when is should have stepped down and left.

    Quote Originally Posted by ILyekkaKai
    OK, so what I don't get is why would iStan show any malice or bad intent for RIII when they have been friends for years?


    Because I have not come out and openly criticised iStan, doesn?t mean we?ve been friends for years. I deplore much of iStan?s behaviour to many people here ? people whom he professed to hold in respect and friendship and whose honesty, integrity and sincerity he has abused most profoundly. While I have had no personal problems with iStan, I?ve seen his actions against others and found them deplorable.

    I have no dealings with iStan through my own choice ? I asked him, several years ago, to not phone me at home and I do not respond to his e-mails. Any dealings I?ve had I?ve kept publicly in the moderators? forum or here, in friendly neutrality, on the bored. Except for a few wishes about his good health and happiness for the New Year, I?ve not exchanged PMs with him until I gave him my notice two weeks ago. We have an uneasy neutrality.

    Quote Originally Posted by ILyekkaKai
    And if he has it out for RIII so bad, why did he not just revoke her mod privileges without her announcement...like out of the blue?
    Because that would make him look bad. As Karuba said, he?s a clever man and he wasn?t born yesterday.

    I have always been fair with my dealings with iStan. I have defended him, I have worked hard to save his bored, and I have stood by and watch him do some awful things to people. For him to come out and revoke my privileges would reflect badly on him. For him to come and give me a slap in the face, quietly while no one is looking is far more his style. He avoids open confrontation, but he?s ever ready with a little dig or back-handed compliment. Anyone and everyone here knows that I will not take that lying down.

    I can?t tell you the number of people who?ve asked me ?is he really that cunning? and the answer is, most emphatically, YES!

    Quote Originally Posted by mmlover
    Wow, this sure looks like d?j? vu.

    I find it really interesting that so much fuss is being made because RIII got her mod privileges taken away a mere two days early. God forbid she should have been called all hours of the day and night, screamed at, all manners of unfounded accusations of treachery, then total denial of these accusations later, etc, etc?
    I remember you telling me about the phone calls, but only after it had all happened and I contacted you to apologise and hear your side of the story. I do sincerely apologise. As I mentioned above, if it wasn?t for iStan?s threat of closing the bored down completely, I would never have agreed to become a moderator. I had already begun to privately question his behaviour and motives on the old board, but I freely admit was unprepared for the extent of it.


    Your comments about those phone calls were partly why, after receiving a couple of calls myself ? pseudo-friendly, but full of insinuations and threats - that I asked iStan not to phone me at home. Luckily it was my husband who answered the phone and he saw how visibly upset I was by iStan?s comments. I think the fact that I wasn?t on my own helped with the situation. I can only assume how badly he abused you to your face mmlover and I?m sorry, after all you did for this bored, that you should have had to go through that. You are right, it outweighs anything I have been subjected to. Sadly you were not the only one who was so deceived.

    Quote Originally Posted by mmlover
    [ I also find it interesting that only when RIII is so ?threatened? that Karubaluna decides to come out to her defense admitting she knew this behavior had been going on for ages. I suppose that it?s the position that if only you or your friends are affected the rest of us can twist in the wind when we are treated the same way.
    KarubaLuna was and is my dearest friend here on the bored. When I told her how upset I had been because of iStan?s actions she came to offer me support. She is the best and kindest person I know. :smt049

    Quote Originally Posted by mmlover
    Now, two years later somebody is finally speaking up, but only because they and their friends are now persecuted. Now maybe when someone says they may have been attacked, maybe they?re not really just making it up as I was accused last time.

    I expect to get flamed, but I don?t care.
    I would not flame you.

    Someone pointed out to me that is was no accident that four of the board?s most well respected lexxians were appointed mods to deal with the situation. Something Tidus picked up on right away (law school Tidus, it?s just meant to be!) I always said it took the four of us to replace one of mmlover. I?m sorry that it ever happened.

    Quote Originally Posted by lizard
    Sorry to hear about the bad feelings that have been created. Whatever has happened, RIII should know that her contribution has been valued by us, I in particular have always looked forward to her amusing posts.
    Thank you lizard. I always have enjoyed your posts too. It?s not the people here, they are the reason I stayed so long despite my personal misgivings about the owner. I think the bored members are great, as I said in my retirement thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by lizard
    One of my least favorite things about the internet is the ease in which anonymous communication can lead to hostility. This is a general statement not aimed at any of you here-- I make an effort to stay out of most of what goes on in the background on the boards, so I really have no idea about what is going down on this or any of the other lexx boards I frequent.
    If this were one incident and only against myself, I would have ignored it. Heck, I?ve ignored so many others. This is a series of incidents (going back several years as mmlover mentioned), mostly against others, that have culminated in my ?having enough?. Though I fully realize that to the majority of board members this will put me in a very bad light, I am willing to do that as I should have spoken up far louder, long ago. Alas, I didn?t? want to waste the hard work we had all put into our new home and I remember too clearly how at a loss everyone was when the old bored disappeared.

    Quote Originally Posted by iStan
    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    In all fairness, iStan did not erase that post.
    Thank you, RIII.

    I've never edited a post or prevented members from freely posting their thoughts on this bored.
    That is one quality I have admired in you. Though of course it suits the proverb I quoted above, which, if I?m not mistaken is a favourite of yours:

    ?If you sit by the river long enough, you will see the body of your enemy float by.?

    I never was your enemy. I did really appreciate your finding a new home for all us Lexxians. I didn?t squabble with you, I didn?t expose you publicly (until now) for all your abuses of others, particularly those you professed to care for and respect. I am done with this nonsense. What goes around comes around iStan, the recurrent theme in all of this is your behaviour, your abuses. I stuck up for you, I looked the other way, and I was content to leave quietly. You did not behave so generously.

    Oh well.



    Quote Originally Posted by Veyron
    So thats all cool....for the curious what happened here, but its not important.
    Perhaps your curiosity is somewhat satiated.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tidus
    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    In all fairness, iStan did not erase that post.
    First you are pissed at him and now you are defending him?

    I must say, you've come across in this thread as desperate, petty and weak.
    We must all judge with the information we have available to us. Perhaps I have more information than you do.

    I still think you?d make a cracking good lawyer someday. You should look into it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tidus
    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    This does not mean she withdraws that apology (which I know was honestly meant and wholeheartedly given), but just that she has left the bored completely...
    ...for a few weeks.
    The only reason she has come back at all was through friendship to me. You have no conception of what you are judging.


    ~~~

    iStan, in my resignation PM I thanked you for the many happy hours I had spent here. I do thank you. You asked me to post a farewell thread and I replied I wasn?t leaving but stepping down. June 1st was completely acceptable to you at the time. I?m disappointed that you had to make one last jibe, one last insult. Disappointed, but not surprised, as I said in my opening post. I was hoping you?d show your better side. I?m disappointed that after all I did for this bored, you couldn?t bring yourself to just let me step down without insult or injury, without one jibe, no matter how small or inconsequential. (It?s the principle of it Tidus, not the magnitude of the offense) I stand by my original post and should have expected no less after watching you behaviour to others over these past four years.


    RIII

    Oh and iStan, anything you have to say to me can be said here, in this thread. I have pulled no punches and nor should you. However, I prefer to have no further private correspondence from you. Much appreciated. RIII


    Quote Originally Posted by Yoyodyner
    Quote Originally Posted by Tidus
    I must say, you've come across in this thread as desperate, petty and weak.
    Yeah, but she could still kick your ass. :twisted:



    :-D
    :lol: Yoyodyner, you always make me laugh. Love that Jane Austen reference.

    Thank you for letting me leave this post on a happy note. I?ve really, really enjoyed working with you. Your cool rationality has always been a boon.. Thank you. *hugs*
    For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours and laugh at them in our turn. Jane Austen

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by RIII
    We must all judge with the information we have available to us. Perhaps I have more information than you do.
    If that is the case, and you wish to keep that information private, then maybe it would have been a good idea to keep the whole issue private to avoid such judgements of your character?

    For the record, I don't think of you as desperate, petty and weak all the time... just in this thread. I know I said it earlier but I just want to say it again to confirm it.

    I've always seen you as somewhat of a kind, understanding, cool-headed diplomat.. so obviously this thread has come as a bit of a surprise to me.

    But like you said, if I had all the facts then maybe I would understand a little better.

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